Top 3 Illogical Celebrity Fashion and Beauty Lines of 2012

There's nothing like a celebrity scent. Who knew singers had such great olfactory skills?

[Image via Digital Spy].

Without further ado, it's time for a little 2012 review of those strange but true celebrity product launches that sometimes make you wonder if you're just having a strange dream. 2011 was the year of Myleene Klass' nail wraps, but this year these famous names excelled themselves when it came to hidden talents. 

1. Cher Lloyd's perfume - If there's one person I hope to smell like, it must surely be Cher Lloyd. Her intoxicating blend of top notes including whining, pouting and being difficult in interviews, mixed with base notes of chav and reality TV, made for a memorable combination that was bound to be a success. Apparently One Direction will be the next out of the starting blocks to conquer the market, though no word as yet whether the most prominent top note will be Harry Styles' little black book of older women or Zayn's fags. Let's just hope none of the boys watch the film Perfume and take inspiration from Ben Whishaw's dedication to the cause of a perfumier, or the Twittersphere would truly implode with underage girls offering themselves up for sacrifice.

Robbie wished his mates would be a bit more talkative sometimes.

[Image via the Daily Mirror].

2. Robbie Williams' clothing line inspired by his granddad - Those of you with a spare £500 will be pleased to know that you needn't let it burn a hole in your pocket any more. You can exchange it for a Pilot's Leather Jacket, or perhaps dip into it for a cable knit cardigan which will set you back a paltry £135 from the Farrell brand. Ok, so kudos to Robbie Williams for using quality materials in his clothing, such as lambswool, but not many a fan of Rudebox and Candy will have the disposable income to match his price points. Meanwhile, those of you who regularly drop half a grand on a jacket will probably not see Williams as a style icon. 

It Starts With An Idea (ISWAI) clearly wanted its models to be totally unique. 

These three slightly horsey looking blondes tell me that Caggie is the one on the right.

[Image via MTV].

 3. Caggie from MIC's fashion brand - Posh reality TV star Caggie Dunlop (you know, the one who hangs about with people called Binky and Hugo), is all about keeping it real, apparently. That's why she has launched a fashion line that's all about being unpretentious and involves working with upcoming designers (plebs, yah), and - according to MTV - deals with 'themes close to Caggie’s heart: New York, Rebellion, Religion, Da Vinci and The Universe'. That's right, guys, she just can't stop thinking about Leonardo Da Vinci's anatomical studies and black holes and Brian Cox, in between filming that deep thinking existential show, Made in Chelsea. If only the producers would let her have more screen time to discuss her thoughts on Stephen Hawking or perhaps to incite a current affairs debate on the issue of women bishops. Oh, and if you'd like to buy a less cerebral piece from the ISWAI collection then there's a bright pink 'Keep Calm and Caggie On' t-shirt for just £22.

I really do despair for humanity sometimes. Here's to 2013, when we should brace ourselves for yet another onslaught of stylish celebs astounding us with their entrepreneurial nous.

Uniqlo Launches Heattech: As Seen in Vogue, with music by Violet

 The scene was set for the Uniqlo x Vogue party on Oxford Street.

This Thursday I headed off to Oxford Street and was whisked into a winter wonderland at Uniqlo, only with a more practical (rather than Christmassy) vibe. British Vogue has teamed up with the clothing brand to shoot its Heattech range, which insulates your body using seriously clever microfibre technology, and the results were pure fashion. 

Heattech Styled by Vogue: My Verdict

I think it was a great way to break some of the myths surrounding style, i.e. 'beauty is pain', 'you have to suffer to look this good', etc., by showing that you can wrap up warm without looking like a stuffed mushroom and still look cool. So often we drag ourselves out on a cold Saturday night without a coat, because it ruins our outfit, or we brave the elements in a miniskirt and 10 denier tights because we don't want to look too 'sensible' for that hot date (in my case, the hot date is probably with the reduced cake aisle at Tesco, but hey ho...). The thing about Heattech is that it doesn't involve bulky layers but it creates wearable pieces that you wouldn't mind being seen in. 

 Awkward angle, but that's actually Gizzi Erskine at the bar. 

Famous faces who brushed past me included Nat and Leah Weller (who both look impossibly cool in real life), the TV chef and columnist Gizzi Erskine, and the truly beautiful fashion designer Charlie Casely-Hayford, who I was too scared to take a picture of. There were also several bloggers that I recognised from LFW, including Stella from Stella's Wardrobe.

 My sister (and fashion event partner in crime) enjoying an apple cocktail.

 Guests were a mixture of bloggers, celebrities and people from the fashion industry.

 All quiet on the rail front - the tills were silent but the stock looked good.

 Pixie Geldof performed with her band, Violet, who I'd never heard before but they had a really tight set and were well suited to the event. 

If you get the chance to see them live then do.

 The guitarist set the tone for facial fuzz throughout the evening.

 I have never seen so many moustachioed and bearded men in close proximity.

Looking good, guys! (And I hope some of them were for Movember).

 There was a little bit of shoegazing.

I then dropped the bottom of my glass (well, it literally fell out in front of my face) and I was left holding the top of the glass and some ice cubes and a straw. Slightly awkward.

Trust me to have a Miranda moment at a fashion event...

 The crowd watched (and texted, in the foreground).

Quite pleased with how this photo turned out.

 A closer look at Pixie's shoes - heeled clogs with tiny studs.

 [All images my own].

And here's a glimpse of the Vogue shoot for the collaboration.

[Image via Uniqlo].

It was a great evening and I really enjoyed being able to see the combination of magazine editorial and high street style.

LFW S/S13 - A Snippet of Street Style

 A typically eclectic slice of menswear from the courtyard at Somerset House.

[All photos my own.]

 Kate Nash arrives at London Fashion Week, dressed as a space marshmallow. 

 Ada Zanditon shows her new collection, Tigress Reign, with a Kill Bill-inspired video to boot.

 The Exhibition drew me to plenty of fascinating accessories - this is just one of many. 

More photos to follow.

 Stylist Alexis Knox listens to the soundtrack for the Phannatiq video at the Felicities PR event.

 Last year's Fashion Fringe winners, design duo Fyodor Golan, stood next to me!

 This lady was incredibly stylish and I couldn't resist a snapshot.

 2012 Fashion Fringe winner Haizhen Wang lifts his trophy as one of his models looks on.

Here's a selection of what I brought home.

There are so many images still to upload onto the blog, so please do bear with me. I'll eventually put everything on Flickr as well, because there are far too many photos to include on here (yes, really!). 

Some of my catwalk shots did disappoint me, as strangely my fresh-out-the-box Nikon P510 bridge camera wasn't as effective as my Canon SX210IS, where I can always manage to rely on the fail-safe 'Kids and Pets' mode if it all goes tits-up in terms of bright lights and fast moving models. Instead I've ended up with lots of ghostly white outlines of the clothing and the camera has paid too much attention to what the crowds were doing, which is a shame (and doubtless my own fault) but is something I will be rectifying by illustrating what I saw instead. If all else fails, turn to pen and paper. 

Anyway, stay tuned for more LFW images throughout the next few days, and some doodles too.

NYFW S/S13: Victoria Beckham Strikes Again

 Whoever underestimated VB must be kicking themselves by now.

[Images via Style.com].

Time and time again. Victoria Beckham's design skills prove that she knows what women want regarding power dressing without the shoulder pads. This collection, like those before it, showed how you can dress like you mean business without compromising on style. 

I particularly enjoyed the nods to geometric patterns and the overlaying of sheer panels, especially in the central image where you see that those panels are actually on one side of the shoulders and add an unexpected quirk to the design. 

 Angular panels of fabric (and some equally angular brogues) were juxtaposed with softer pieces like those nude sandals in the central image and the bright orange draped jacket on the right.

There's so much wearability in these pieces and it does seem a shame that they carry such high price tags, so I would like to see Mrs. Beckham creating a more affordable diffusion range in the future - I know she has her second line, Victoria by Victoria Beckham, but it still doesn't stoop to the levels of my humble purse. If it did, I'd combine the black cut-out jacket on the left with dresses from COS and vintage boots.

 This was my favourite look of the show: really simple but wearable and in trusty black.

All in all, the collection was as polished as ever but showed serious potential for inspiring the high street. She's created looks that are desirable without being gimmicky, and I can't wait to see what comes next.

British Fashion Awards 2012: The Nominees

She failed to notice she was obstructing the red carpet...

[Image by Valie Export, 1976]

It's BFA time again and the nominees are in. The British Fashion Awards are one of the most celebrated annual fashion events, rightfully highlighting talent in the industry and giving young designers a helping hand. Who's made their mark in 2012? See below. Those marked with an asterisk are my tips for winning the awards.

Accessory Designer

Katie Hillier
Nicholas Kirkwood*
Philip Treacy

Emerging Talent Award: Ready to Wear

J.W. Anderson
Michael van der Ham
Simone Rocha*

Emerging Talent Award: Accessories

Jordan Askill
Sophie Hulme*
Dominic Jones

Emerging Talent: Menswear

Agi & Sam
Lou Dalton
Jonathan Saunders*

Designer Brand

Burberry
Stella McCartney
Alexander McQueen*
Mulberry

Isabella Blow Award for Fashion Creator

Edward Enninful
Katie Grand
Professor Louise Wilson OBE*

New Establishment Award

Erdem
Jonathan Saunders
Meadham Kirchhoff*

Menswear Designer

Richard James* [who has the same name as my uncle, so I'll make him my favourite to win...]
Kim Jones for Louis Vuitton
Oliver Spencer

Model

Cara Delevigne
Jourdan Dunn*
David Gandy

Red Carpet Creator

Victoria Beckham
Roksanda Ilincic*
Stella McCartney
Alessandra Rich

Designer of the Year

Christopher Kane
Mary Katrantzou
Stella McCartney*

British Style Award

Voted for by the public, with an insanely long nominations list, the highlights 

(with my favourite three choices) are:

 Adele
Victoria Beckham
Helena Bonham Carter
Duchess of Cambridge
Henry Holland
Natalie Massenet
Phoebe Philo
Lara Stone
Tilda Swinton*
Tinie Tempah*
Vivienne Westwood*

What do you think of the nominees - is there anyone on there you're surprised to see, or someone you feel has been missed out?

Fashion Thoughts: The FROW Controversy - Pixie Lott's PR Machine

You may or may not have heard the news that irritatingly bland popstar Pixie Lott threw a strop when she couldn't sit on the front row at Mulberry's London Fashion Week show just days ago. Yes, it's not exactly a scoop to discover that not everyone can have a prime spot on the benches when they're viewing the catwalk, but what was perhaps more shocking was the lack of genuine fashion interest from either Ms. Lott or her PR team. 

The Daily Telegraph reported that Lott's PR spokesperson said, "The whole point of Pixie being there is to be in the front row," which is a valid comment as she is a marketable commodity, but surely the whole purpose of attending a show is to see what the designer has created - in this case, to marvel at Emma Hill's genius. In both Pixie Lott's actions and her PR's comment there has been no disguising the fact that a genuine fashion lover would not behave in this way. If you are lucky enough to attend a show, regardless of your level of fame, you should feel privileged to have this access - either that, or politely decline and let someone who has a valid interest take your place. 

 [What Pixie Lott missed at Mulberry: image by Vladimir Potop, via The Daily Telegraph]. 

I would quite happily be sat up in the lighting rigs of the BFC Showspace at Somerset House if it meant that I got a glimpse of the catwalk first hand. As it's not often that I get to see a catwalk show in person (you can say that again - my first trip inside the BFC Showspace was yesterday), I will happily make do with the brilliant coverage on sites like Style.com, Fashionising and Grazia Daily or Elle, if not the official coverage from London Fashion Week. For some strange reason, and not just because her music is not to my taste, I cannot imagine Pixie Lott eagerly logging onto her computer to get her fashion fix in time, though she has put her name to two clothing lines for British brand Lipsy and she will wax lyrical about her fashion obsession if she's being interviewed. This is where Lott differs from enthusiastic bloggers like Tavi Gevinson and stylish celebrities such as Victoria Beckham or Nicola Roberts, who carefully cultivate their own looks without a stylist and read magazines like they're bibles. They are hard grafters who are not afraid to take risks and have established themselves within the fashion industry for good reason.

I am not saying that a popstar should have an ingrained love of fashion, or even a tolerance of it, but they shouldn't create a 'fashion designer' persona if they don't give a damn about a show unless they can use it to self-publicise. A celebrity who has their own clothing line and builds up an image of creativity should be very careful not to shatter the illusion by revealing that they are only attending catwalk shows for attention. I'm sure that Mulberry will not lose sleep over Lott's walkout, but she may have just lost herself a few invites next season.

Remembrance Poppies - Patrick Wolf keeps the trend alive

[Image via the Patrick Wolf Palisade Tumblr site].

Here in Britain we have a great tradition of wearing paper poppies as a sign of remembrance for those who fought in wars since WWI. It's not necessarily about patriotism, more about the recognition of courage, peril and loss, with the poppy being chosen after its prevalence in the fields of WWI battle sites. I wear one every year, with particular thoughts for the members of my family who were involved in WWI and WWII, with traumatic and life-changing consequences. The singer Patrick Wolf, who is a favourite of mine, posted an image today on his Tumblr blog of his poppy being proudly worn for his 'soldier ancestors and all those who never came home', and he encouraged others to do the same - 'be sure to wear yours this November'.

I'm glad that Wolf has shown his support for this cause and promoted it to his fans, because it's slowly becoming more and more difficult to raise awareness and for people to properly acknowledge Remembrance Sunday and Armistice Day. When you buy your paper poppy you are not provided with a safety pin to attach it to your clothes because that was deemed too risky by the health and safety police a few years ago, so now you are responsible for your own pin-related injuries. Luckily the Poppy Appeal has been gradually moving towards fashion alternatives so that people can incorporate the cause into their everyday wardrobe more effectively, and without a safety pin problem in sight. I also wanted to explore poppy-inspired looks that take the strong colour or image and use it with stunning results, because I felt it's important to translate this theme to daily life and fashion (the very angles that the Poppy Appeal has taken).

[Image via the Poppy Appeal's Shop].
This large crystal brooch, £25, by Buckley won't get damaged in the rain (a danger of the paper ones) and it's glitzy enough to make an impact. Brooches have been having a major resurgence in fashion over the past couple of years, due to the demand for vintage-inspired clothing and the return to a British heritage look. You could wear this well with a tea dress and brogues.

[Image via the Poppy Appeal's Shop].
At secondary school I used to pin two poppies in my hair, to make them stand out more. These Kleshna enamel hair slides feel like a more mature version of my idea, and they'd also be useful for coaxing your hair into pin curls. Setting you back £12.95 for two, they're more expensive than normal hair accessories but you won't find them anywhere else and you're also helping out the Poppy Appeal with your purchase.

For the ultimate in poppy-inspired decadence, get some inspiration from this Acne Moorea evening dress with eye-catching asymmetric straps. In 'poppy red', it's a stunning colour that would be complemented nicely by the hair slides. Available from My-Wardrobe.com.

Vivienne Westwood's Anglomania range has made use of 'Poppy tartan twill' fabric to create a selection of pieces that would give you the figure of a wartime sweetheart. This blouse (£295) is curve-creating and celebrates the beauty of a feminine figure. It would look great topped off with a poppy necklace and a faux fur tippet. Available from Net-A-Porter.

For a more literal interpretation, Topshop has this ombre-dyed blouse (£40) that contrasts vermillion with inky blue. It's a sophisticated piece, with bell sleeves and a high neck, though you wouldn't want to pin a poppy through the delicate fabric. As an alternative, the Kleshna hair slides would continue the theme, or you could opt for a poppy phone charm from the official Appeal Shop.

Lastly, Jonathan Saunders has gone print crazy with this poppy scarf at Harrods, which takes the motif and uses a variety of colours (everything from turquoise to moss green). It's a very modern take on this traditional flower, but somehow the mix really works. At £289 it's pretty pricey, so you might prefer to make a donation to the Poppy Appeal instead.

Armistice Day - 11th November.
Remembrance Sunday - 13th November.

Art and Fashion: Delaroche meets Deacon

[Image via Style.com]
When Ajak Deng modelled this figure-hugging Giles Deacon dress back in February as part of his AW11-12 show, little could we have imagined it would catch the eye of so many celebrities. Based on the protagonist of Paul Delaroche's seminal painting, The Execution of Lady Jane Grey, it was perhaps a more intellectual choice than your everyday satin slip for a red carpet event. Personally I've always loved the painting and it's one of my must-sees if you ever visit the National Gallery in London, so the fact that it's been transformed into a wearable piece is really exciting.

[Image via Style.com]
With a waspish waist, this version of the print plays into the painting's themes of being trapped and bound, as well as turning the idea of innocence on its head somewhat. The wearer of this dress is very much in control and flaunts her silhouette, unlike poor Jane who is being guided to the executioner's block. It's an undeniably dramatic choice as a dress. In case you're wondering who Lady Jane Grey was, she had been handed the English crown as Henry VIII's son Edward lay dying. An aristocratic girl with plans for female empowerment, Jane's rule lasted just nine days before she was ousted by Edward's Catholic sister, Mary Tudor. History lesson over.

[Image via Style.com]
This time Deacon has bound the image in a layer of nude that mirrors his previous contouring attempts, but is perhaps more futuristic and angular. The addition of a polo neck also means that the wearer's head floats above their body, which is perhaps cruel considering the beheading that the original picture is preparing us for. Yet, in this tiny excerpt, we cannot see the other figures or the fate that Jane awaits, so she is merely presented as a blindfolded girl. The context of Delaroche's painting is lost here, and it's certainly an unusual interpretation.

[Image courtesy of Empics].
I think Lily Cole (left) had the right expression with this dress - it's hard to smile when you're working execution chic. Pixie Geldof suits the shape best, and the peep toe heels she's chosen are a better addition than Lily's basic courts or Li Na's clumpy shoe boots - the band of the peep toe mirrors the band of the blindfold in the print.

[Image via Google].

Here's the Delaroche painting in all its glory. It's scary, macabre and historically important, and it ensures that Lady Jane Grey isn't confined to paragraphs in history textbooks; she's remembered as a tragic but pivotal woman in the story of the English monarchy. And she looks great on fabric.

Three Celebrity 'Creatives' = Three Braincells

[Image via shesomajor.com] Geri Halliwell has blessed the British high street (well, Next) with her talent for stitching pieces of satin together and adding some very 90s spaghetti straps in strategic places. Okay, I do like the shade of the navy one, but otherwise this is essentially a lesson in how celebrity 'designers' can rip people off. There is nothing memorable or unique about these dresses and, as you can see from the lanky models, only short people such as Geri will be able to get a gown that skims the floor.

[Image via BruceJuice]. Every time I read a gossip magazine article about young popstars such as the highly banal Pixie Lott being hailed as 'style icons', a little part of me dies inside. The girl has a stylist who chooses her clothes and guides her towards each trend, making it somewhat laughable that Lott now professes to be a fashion designer with her regular capsule collections for Lipsy. Her style drops include numerous 'reinventing the wheel' moments, such as the shift dress available in both black and white (oh Pixie, you spoil us with your innovation), floral dresses, playsuits and more floppy hats than you can shake a stick at. Similar pieces can be found at every single fashion outlet on the planet, for considerably less cash.

[Image from Fashion Fame, depicting Katy Perry's Purr promo]. The prerequisite for becoming a 21st century female celeb is to release your own perfume. It doesn't matter if you have any olfactory interests, or if you even know what olfactory means, because you will suddenly wake up one day dreaming of fragrance topnotes and a burning desire to make everyone smell your talent. In recent months we've been encouraged to buy into Jennifer Aniston (l'eau du permanently single female), Rihanna (l'eau du skimpy outfits and S&M videos) and Katy Perry (l'eau du awkward high-profile marriage). Perry perhaps tops the list for me, as she promoted her scent whilst dressed in a catsuit with a giant ball of twine. Catnip not included.

My plea to celebrities who want to cash in on their fifteen minutes of fame with a clothing or perfume range? GET BACK TO YOUR DAY JOB. Ditto Justin Bieber and his nail varnish for tweens, which is undeniably odd and desperate. Other viable alternatives for less random self-promotion are the ghost-written autobiography and the calendar; both of these are accepted as the norm and are much easier to stomach as a moneyspinner, because they make sense and they involve little effort. I require a celebrity to dress me about as much as I need a banker doing my hair, or a laywer cooking my dinner. Let's hope that we're not soon to be graced with L'eau du Ryan Giggs or the clothing range from Chipmunk. Fingers most definitely crossed.

N.B. Thanks to Holly Lowe for alerting me to the Geri Halliwell collection.